Ok, my husband (separated, not divorced) and I have 1 child whose 13. We have been separated for almost 9 months now and I just filled for child support a few weeks ago. I tried to give him the benefit of doubt and let him prove to me that he was still going to do his part w/o someone making him, but he's not. He only pays for minor things and that's only maybe 2 times a month. Here's my question...the woman that he's with has kids and knows he has a son. How can you be with a man and he's   more...

Ok, my husband (separated, not divorced) and I have 1 child whose 13. We have been separated for almost 9 months now and I just filled for child support a few weeks ago. I tried to give him the benefit of doubt and let him prove to me that he was still going to do his part w/o someone making him, but he's not. He only pays for minor things and that's only maybe 2 times a month. Here's my question...the woman that he's with has kids and knows he has a son. How can you be with a man and he's with you everyday and never has his child and you not push the issue of him spending time with his own child? I understand the need and want to have him to yourself, but if he doesn't take time out for his own child, what do you think he will do for you if he gets one by you? Maybe it's me, but if the guy I talk to has children and I know he does, there's no way you can spend 6 days a week up under me and only 1 day with your child(ren). less...

It's unfortunate that it will require legal action for your husband to help provide for your son. That should be something he does, if for no other reason, out of love for his child. You, the courts, the other woman or anyone else shouldn't need to force that.

I totally agree.Take his sorry keister(Hide) to the the barn door and nail it there. for all to see!!! Just because the marriage is over and destroyed that does not abrogate one's responsibilities to one's children.I feel if he won't buck and help with the costs of the kids up and spend Real Quality time with his son. That then lessens chance of him doing the right thing is pretty slim.If he can' or won't be there to support his kids emotionally and financially.Hit it him where it hurts (T  more...

I totally agree.Take his sorry keister(Hide) to the the barn door and nail it there. for all to see!!! Just because the marriage is over and destroyed that does not abrogate one's responsibilities to one's children.I feel if he won't buck and help with the costs of the kids up and spend Real Quality time with his son. That then lessens chance of him doing the right thing is pretty slim.If he can' or won't be there to support his kids emotionally and financially.Hit it him where it hurts (The wallet). less...

Girl, don't hesitate to take his behind to court. I did, and it took me 8 MONTHS to get support ordered. And he paid not ONE cent until it was ordered. Now, after 15 years of marraige and my supporting him through all his career moves (while mine was flapping in the breeze...), I have to wait for all to be settled for alimony! Like the two years I've been waiting already don't count!! This is what you need to avoid. Take him to court. DO NOT play nice. I guarantee you. He will not be pl  more...

Girl, don't hesitate to take his behind to court. I did, and it took me 8 MONTHS to get support ordered. And he paid not ONE cent until it was ordered. Now, after 15 years of marraige and my supporting him through all his career moves (while mine was flapping in the breeze...), I have to wait for all to be settled for alimony! Like the two years I've been waiting already don't count!! This is what you need to avoid. Take him to court. DO NOT play nice. I guarantee you. He will not be playing nice, either.--True less...

Not really worried about her , but afraid she will drag my children down with her. The first kid with #3 was an OOPS.She had the second for selfish reasons I Feel. She did not want the first child to be lonely.

Quietandlonely, I am with you. I do not understand how a woman can deal with a man who won't take time to see his own flesh and blood. Does she think that her kids will replace his kids?? What makes her think that she is so special that he will always be there for his step family when he cannot even be there for "the fruit of his loin"?? These kind of women make me sick. In my opinion, she is not only allowing a man to be irresponsible, but she is setting her own kids up for the p  more...

Quietandlonely, I am with you. I do not understand how a woman can deal with a man who won't take time to see his own flesh and blood. Does she think that her kids will replace his kids?? What makes her think that she is so special that he will always be there for his step family when he cannot even be there for "the fruit of his loin"?? These kind of women make me sick. In my opinion, she is not only allowing a man to be irresponsible, but she is setting her own kids up for the possibility of being abandoned by another man!!

Thank goodness that your son has you in his life to make sure that regardless of what his dad does, you are doing all that you can to let your son have an active and fulfulling life. And good for you for going after him for child support. Even if he decides to live his life as if his son does not exist, I think that you are doing the right thing by taking him to court for child support. Not to be vindictive, but for the sheer fact that he has to carry some of the responsibility for his son, whether he likes it or not.

Good luck to you. Keep on doing what you need to do for your son. It may be difficult now, but it will all pay off when he has grown up to be the man that his father isn't. less...

Well if he was a REAL MAN he would take care of his children. NO matter what Perceived beef he may have with the ex wife. I say that type of action is a good Indicator.What a real piece of garbage he really is. There is a saying that I have used to get me through my messy divorce. It is from SUN TSU from his book the "Art of War" (If you wait by the river of life, The bodies of your Emmies will come floating by.)I take this as No evil deed goes unpunished. So far this has been t  more...

Well if he was a REAL MAN he would take care of his children. NO matter what Perceived beef he may have with the ex wife. I say that type of action is a good Indicator.What a real piece of garbage he really is. There is a saying that I have used to get me through my messy divorce. It is from SUN TSU from his book the "Art of War" (If you wait by the river of life, The bodies of your Emmies will come floating by.)I take this as No evil deed goes unpunished. So far this has been true in the dealings with my ex.Her family has been taking advantage of her, her "BOY TOY"Partner#3 is a Drunk, gives her little monetary,and emotional support and she now has two kids A week old and a year old ) So she will have to go through raising two more children. Having a partner that treats her well like her first partner did (**ITTY) . I was #2. I busted my hump at times worked three jobs to provide for the family.But she wanted MORE. One can only give 110% for so long then there is nothing left less...

Men. Unfortunately, there are so many of them that just try their damndest to get away with as much as they can. I think it's a quest, or some macho-guy thing: how many times can I screw one over before I get caught. I don't know. Been there with the child support thing. Try THREE boys, no support for almost a year! (for a man making almost 6000/month, it's near unheard of, but my ex pulled it off. They either just don't give a rat's behind or have no conscience...I can't quite figure out   more...

Men. Unfortunately, there are so many of them that just try their damndest to get away with as much as they can. I think it's a quest, or some macho-guy thing: how many times can I screw one over before I get caught. I don't know. Been there with the child support thing. Try THREE boys, no support for almost a year! (for a man making almost 6000/month, it's near unheard of, but my ex pulled it off. They either just don't give a rat's behind or have no conscience...I can't quite figure out how to describe that one...-_True less...

I understand what you are saying. I knew this guy that wanted to date me, but he mentioned his son lived in NYC and he lived in DC but it had been about a year since he saw his son. Later on in the same conversation he was trying to make plans to come see me in GA. I told him he should go to see his son. I asked him to explain how he could make time to come see me but not his own child. He couldn't do it...so bye bye.

Well hun my son just turned 16yrs old today, and his dad left me when I was pregnant I have raised my son all by myself..He thinks just cause he puts a check in the mail for support he is doing his part Well sry to tell him what he pays buys nothing so I work my @@@ off to make sure my son has everything he needs..So he isnt the only one who is a dead beat dad..and the women who are with them are only worried about the S@@